Leaders, believe in others
“Treat a man as he is and he will remain as he is. Treat a man as he can and should be and he will become as he can and should be” (Johann Goethe, German Philosopher)
Most people respond to being treated with respect by elevating their thoughts and actions to the same level of respect they are given — or beyond. Showing someone respect can be uplifting or even life changing. Ricky Byrdsong, former basketball coach at Northwestern University, in ‘Coaching Your Kids in the Game of Life’, relates his story of being ‘seen’:
“I remember it like it was yesterday. Tenth grade, Frederick Douglas High School in Atlanta. Tall and gangly, I was pushing my way through the crowded hallway. All of a sudden, a big, booming voice pealed like a thunderclap behind me: “Hey, son!”It was Coach William Lester. He was a big, barrel-chested man, six feet, four inches. Besides being the junior varsity basketball coach, he also had a reputation as the school disciplinarian, so the first thing I thought was somebody’s in trouble. He fixed me with his piercing eyes and bellowed, “Yeah, you son!”Weak-kneed, I started walking towards him. Oh my, what had I done? I stopped in front of him, all six feet, five inches of me trembling in my shoes. “Son,” he said, looking me up and down. “You’re too big to be walking these halls and not playing basketball. I’ll see you in the gym at 3:30 today.””But coach,” I sputtered. “I’ve never played basketball. I don’t have any basketball clothes or shoes.””Son, did you hear what I said? I’ll see you at 3:30!” And he walked away.So, I went, and from that day until now, there’s no question in my mind that everything that has happened to me since, becoming a basketball player, then a coach, raising my three kids, writing a book, is a result of that day when Coach called me out and said, “Hey, son! Yes, you!”Up until that point, I hadn’t been a troublemaker, but I was drifting. I had no idea what my goals were or where I was heading. Coach Lester helped me see something bigger out there. I remember when he told me, “You can get a college scholarship.”When I said, “But I don’t know how. I don’t have it,” he said, “Yes, you do. I am going to show you. I am going to work with you. You can do it.” And he was right. I knew it the day I set foot on a college campus, scholarship in hand. He believed in me. Many times since the day I heard that big voice bellow, “Hey, son!” I’ve thought, if only every kid had a Coach William Lester to believe in him, what a difference it would make.”
Seeing potential in others, believing in them and showing respect for them lifts the human spirit to new heights. Dr Stephen R Covey (in Everyday Greatness) says: “The principle of respect always sobers and humbles me, perhaps as much as any other principle. It contains a spirit of reverence for people. It brings a feeling of awe for the human spirit and for whom each person has the potential to become as a unique, progressing individual.”
Leaders, believe in others. Leadership is communicating people’s worth and potential so clearly that they are inspired to see it in themselves.
Originally published at https://www.stretchforgrowth.com on September 1, 2024.
